3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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