the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
