I must be too annoying 4 u.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Text me some of your sweat
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
