Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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