I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize