Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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