Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
