You work out of a Hotel?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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