come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
