Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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