Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
