Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
