I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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