he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
