Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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