they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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