quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
