I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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