Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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