Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
