i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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