There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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