I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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