In America we eat man semen.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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