Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
