think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
