Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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