This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
