i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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