I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Is Oprah even human
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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