Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
