Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
