The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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