Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
