I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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