dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize