you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
