I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We're too hungover to prance.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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