you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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