the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
