i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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