Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
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