he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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