It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
