i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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