Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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