Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
