why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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