How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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