listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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